Thursday, January 27, 2011

Just Scribbling!!!

Dear Sakshi,
      When ur emotionally drained what do u usually do...well...they say to channel ur energy towards positive realms and charge ur low! but it works ok? I know of people who go into a scribbling frenzy just when they feel challenged or when they are in the deepest of melancholy moods...:-) not that i feel the same way...i knw when i wanna write, my fingers literally fly over the keyboard and it doesn't stop unless the flow of thoughts stop....I don't knw if that's the way ur supposed to feel. Another thing I noticed were my spelling mistakes...sorry guys, usually I don't get the time to recheck what I have written. Mostly its a wild chase to pen down my thoughts as fast as possible before the little one wakes up...These days I have to do everything quickly, be it cooking, cleaning or even (sigh!) going to the! Seriously!!! coz every nano second matters....right now i keep making trips to his bedroom to see if he is waking up or not...:-))) so blogging is usually last on my list, and if at all I do blog, then I have  to do it fast and no reviews are allowed. The only major plus point being that my typing speed has increased!!!
      I am on a dieting spree which tastefully allows space for my lil' treats as well....But I am gradually on the road to better dress sizes! Immediately after ur delivery, there is this irresistable urge to look good,which usually doesn't happen since u are probably looking like a deflated baloon! Sigh! But a word of advice to my friends who are on the road to motherhood...Don't worry,it will pass...but always concentrate on ur face!!! Don't look sloppy and try as much to look fresh and neat and with a smile on ur face....I knw I knw, even with ur under eye dark circles and mood swings and all u can still feel good, if ur presentable and look good to urself in the mirror, hmmm and maybe a new haido will also give u the instant feel good hormones!!!...There are gonna be a zillion comments thrown at u, oh boy!!! its just amazing how totally insensitive and stupid people can be during thost post preggy times...whew!!! Ur gonna feel the same way, trust me! Initially it was really irritating for me, but then I realised, what the hell, if I feel beautiful then well and good...soon the yapping tongues faltered...:-) So this time Sakshi I dedicate this to  positive thinking, which I terribly lack! So in order to boost positive thinking, I write about positive thinking! ;-) By the way, quite a bit of my friends are nearing their due date....All the best gurlz!!! and I'll be praying for all of u...and remember no matter how much the pain focus on the moment u'll be seeing ur lil' one!!!! So adios until next time, keep smiling folks!!! Time for me to have my London Diary Lite Vanilla Icecream ;-) sigh! God bless the one who created icecreams!!! :-)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The first moment of pure bliss!

Dear Sakshi,
       Unnikuttan is taking his beauty sleep time for me to enter into my small world of thoughts....I have never shared with u guys the very first moments of my motherhood....something i wanted to delve into only when i had the time for it...i mean those were life's most amazing moments despite the pain and all!!! YESSS! The pain was mightmarish, but i still remember the words of my gyn, the anaesthesiologist and the nurses....I was blessed with a gr8 gyn team!!! I remember kicking one of the doctors, lol!!! It was complete mayhem...I went from normal to c-section in a matter of hours!!! I was aware of everything as a blur, but the moment the doc pulled my baby out and said its a boy!!! is the clearest most sharpest moment of my life!!! I obviously cudn't see beyond a green sheet....(not tht i wanted to!) :-) All I was straining for was to hear his cries...coz u know u hear all sorts of labour jists...and everyone talks about the first cry....I remember reading about labour from the point of view of the babyyy...have we ever thought about tht??? Its always our pain, and discomforts....but the baby once it comes out has this major struggle for his first breath...its almost like drowning and being saved at the last min...yes i remember was in reader's digest!!! Since then i was always curious about the baby's first ever cry....the first time he fights with life ever...I cudn't hear it at first,a sharp panic touched my heart, soon after which i heard the doc giving one tight slap! ouch! Hmmm the first slap he gets!!! and yes ths angry young screaming lil' guy was lifted out and shown to me...I saw him! my angel!!! only he wasn't too happy...I could almost hear him say,"What the hell mama!!! I was taking a nap n a comfy corner and just then u had to pull me out! Mothers!!! and Gyns!!! Hmph!" Lol! :-D And then just when i was trying to figure out his tiny tiny eyes and nose...Blackout! Sheesh!!! U know u hardly get seconds to see ur lil one as a whole in a c section...i mean with a bit of consicousness that is....u need to wait quite some time  before u can see him again....Whew!!! I then wondered about my gyn...she has delivered hundreds and hundreds of babies...and each time its a heartening experience...they have the same twinkle in their eye, the satisfaction, and yes though they are tired and do the same drill a zillion times...they don't forget to smile at u....and say,"Conrats its a boy" :-) or girl....:-))
          But then the pain came...oh wow!!! it was one hell of a pain...all my c section friends wud understand what i mean....I was wheeled out hours later...and i remember looking skeptically at my nurse when she said I should be up and walking the next day!!! I was like yup ur kidding!!! :-D What would we have done without such good docs and nurses!!!! So this one I dedicate to the entire team at the Credence Hospital and my gyn Dr Santhamma Mathew...We always talk about our experiences, but I was wondering about how helpless these lil angels are...for them each and every day would have been trying and frustrating for them...Its never possible to fully understand an infant until they start talking, but as a mother u can always sense to a certain accurate extent what they would want....It was sooo tough initially....but then today when he managed to pull himself up on to the sofs by himself.....and gave me a joyful giggle....i knw it means a lot for him!!!! :-)

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Hellooo 2011!

Dear Sakshi,
   Gosh I can't believe tht my last post was on july!!! Sorry guyss was terribly busy! Am back in Doha nw and can u imagine??? my lil' angel is gonna turn a year old this March 5th!!! And last year I was writing about his kicks and stunts in my! Well he is doing all that and more now! He crawls pretty fast now, and is trying to walk!!!! His each milestone was met with surprise and pure joy! No matter how irritated or depressed I become,one lil' mischeivious grin of his, can wipe away all my woes if any! I am able to concentrate more on my music and dance nw...yess its very difficult to manage everything, its like walking on the pole in a circus! Whew! But there is a joy within, a feeling of goodness, of being part of a family and of having someone to call ur own to fight with, to cry and laugh with, to yell and scream in frustration and then to feel completely stupid about it....yesss my poor hubby had to bear with all of it! But when I think about it I realise that that's what makes life complete....vinuz had had to bear the brunt of my moods... :-) but he had  always been there as a strong support! Its heartening to see father and son play and fight with each other....they share a special bond and I just like to sit back and watch the scene unfold.... My lil'guy is growing and i can't still grasp the reality of it all!!! Luv the two most amazing men in my life!!!!