Finally my lil' angel and our cosy family :-)

Dear Sakshi,
   My baby poo is napping which gives me some time to pen down my thoughts....gosh missed writing in my blog sooo much...My lil' angel is 4 months now....and ya there are frustrating hair pulling days, but there are absolutely lovely ones as well....He smiles, laughs and says gaga and gu gu now...lol! just rolled over once or twice...he s more interested in sitting up and grabbing everything in sight...It gives me such joy to tap down my thoughts like this...Life is tough yet beautiful...:-) We have our good days and bad days...I am always filled with doubts and a hundred anxieties surfaces when he cries incessantly...how do I know what's wrong??? But I am finally coping with it....Vinuz also helps a loooot!!!! Dunno what I would have done without my wonderful better half...Ya! we have our rows...but at the end of it all we love to cuddle together with our baby unnikuttan and now we feel complete as a couple...Usually u say a couple means two na? but for us we the couple is complete only with our angel....

         We started taking him out in the stroller and he luvs it too.....ya well the first trip ended in a crying tsunami!!! whew!!! I was completely lost and I ended up crying as well...I know! sheesh! that's childish of me, but I feel ur baby brings out the child in u, as u begin to move with him....u too get excited over his toys and giggles....The first time he laughed out loud!! that was yesterday...I wanted to keep hearing it, I felt maybe I should record it....like a thousand rainbows, or maybe like a thousand angels springing forth celebrating his happiness....It was a very emotional moment for both of us...:-) I luv my lil' angel and i guess luv at first sight for a mom is when u see ur hubby and baby together and u know u have been blessed!!! Gosh! enough for today....will write more soon...:-) this one is for my mom and dad as well, whose pains in bringing me up, I now realise and I hope I can do a gud job as well....Thank u God for every tiny drop of happiness and sorrow as well....coz otherwise u wouldn't realise the value of ur life and its people around u...take care all of uuu :-)

When ur life revolves around ur babyyy ;-)

Ten fingers,



Ten toes


He's laughter and teardrops


So small and brand new


And amazingly angelic


He is sent to bless you


He's one special Baby


The best of life's treasure


And will grant and bless you


Many hours of great pleasure.


-- Author Unknown

Dear Sakshi,
    I just loved this quote sooo much tht I cudn't help posting it...:-) Truly each day is an adventure for me and my angel....The latest achievement being that I finally have started bathing my lil' one, its as if ur not a complete mother unless u know how to bathe feed and clean ur baby....the initial vulnerability has passed anywasy....and the fact that i get time at all to write my blog is purely a miracle....I can see him slowly coming awake from his cat nap, lol! My life is like totally dependent on his schedule now...completely without an ounce of exaggeration....whew! I hardly realise the time flying by...everything is a huge blur except my unnikuttan....thts wht I call him at home....he has already got numerous nicknames....but for me he will always be my adorable sweethr8 nnikuttan....ook! I guess I'll be able to write more, he has settled down again off to the land of nod!.....So much has passed by and to think that a few months back this lil' fellow was in my tummy!!! :-) There are times when u feel completely wiped out but then one angelic smile can take away all that tiring moments out of ur life....He is waking up guyz so i'll pen more later....luv ya all!!!!

Raghav...our lil' angel... :-) I'm a mommy!!!!

Dear dear Sakshi,
       Gosh!!!! Its been sooo long, but as u know, its been a tremendous transition for me guys....:-) Finally motherhood has embraced me and u knw what it feels great!!! despite the sleepless nights, and all the crying and screaming.....but now the smiles and laughs and gurgling has started....It feels like heaven, no matter how bugged u are, hw depressed, tired or totally wiped out u are, one look at ur angel's face and ur entire world lights up!!! I hardly knew the days passing by, its now I finally got a breather....whew!!! my lil one is busy exploring his new world, which would give me little time in between, and in those interludes, I will share the most beautiful moments of my life with all my dear dear friends....I keep telling about how I feel as a mom, but what about the feeling of being a dad!!! thts even more special u know...Vinu was just ecstatic!!! and it has made our bond of love stronger and deeper...:-) This lil' angel arrived on march 5th 2010, bringing a special sort of love into our lives....I can't explain nor can I ever ever convey my feelings to the letter....I just know that this is one happiness that God bestows on u, but its a huge responsibility as well...I wonder if I'll be a perfect mom, but i'll try to be a mom that he loves....So later guyz, my angel just halloooowed for me....take care all of u....:-)

12 Dayz more....

Dear Sakshi,
     Imagine!!! just 12 dayz more and for all u know I am still tapping my fingers on my desk talking to my lil' one and waiting! :-) Sigh! Patience is a virtue isn't it? Well I am fast running out of stock of what little patience I already had...These days comfiness is a faraway dream, but anticipation is sky high....and u know something, these days I have started to form a wicked habit of suddenly ringing up my relatives and friends....whts wicked about it? :-)) ;-)  Well...most of the time they think I would have gone into labour and by giving them sudden calls I scare the living daylights out of them lol! Ok ok I knw thts not a nice thing to do, but ahem!!! I felt like a kiddo all over again, gosh! I was such a prankster as a baby and as a kid! ahem,my hubby still thinks I act like a 4 year old kid, at times ook? :-) Hmm...well what's the harm in feeling like a child all over again, have u ever felt that, haven't u for once wanted to throw away all the rigidity of adulthood and enjoy life as a kid would? Well its not always possible, coz' yes u have certain responsibilities, but hey! dnt ever lose that fun loving child in u...ever....its too precious and by the time u realise that, then its too late as well....Life is too complicated these days, everyone is soo busy and running around trying to make ends meet, make money of course! thts of prime importance nw isn't it? Well it should be, what with all the topsy turviness of the current economy. Yikes!!! I am talking like a lifestyle analyst, help!!!!

This is what happens when u have too much time to urself...:-) So my lil' one is gettin ready to face the big bad world outside and hmm...well I wnt be too negative regarding how bad the world is...:-) I am sooo excited , nervous, tired, frustrated and what not!!! Its like I myself am an emotional kaleidoscope, whew!!! Well folks if I dnt go into labour in the next few days I might come back with more of my thoughts, otherwise adios! and yes I will keep all of u updated on how my D day was...Until then take care guyz, luv u all my dear friends and ya pray for me!!! :-)

Dear Sakshi,
                Life is like an everflowing, undulating river, taking us along with it to destinies etched out for us. At times it seems favourable to us, at other times it seems suffocating yet when we put it all together, it seems it does have a meaningful picture ultimately.
:-) Ook enough philosophy already!!! You tend to become atleast slightly introspective, at times like this. I am sooo full of anticipation these days and I have become more spiritual as well. Do we all tend to feel consoled having faith in the Supreme being, at a time which is most important to us? Well I have immense relief from just the thought that God will take care of me and my lil' one. Faith is a strong medicine in itself, I believe :-) Not many may agree with me, but I speak with the benefit of the experiences I have gone through, which have moulded my faith strongly.
              I do listen to a lot of music. if only to soothe my nerves...:-) mostly ghazals and soft melodies...:-) Sometimes I am soo disturbed with a zillion confusions in my mind, at other times I feel sort of a complete harmony with myself... Its just a matter of days now, and really I can't wait to see my lil' one now...The feeling, I don't know what it is, but it is indeed a special feeling, but I am scared as well, well a teeny weeny bit!!! Now think about it!! How many of us take our dear mom and dad for granted, and when we are about to go through the same journey,u realise the huge responsibility looming in front of us and then we think, " How will we ever repay what our parents have gone through for us." And then we realise our love for our parents in a more special way. So today I thank God for giving me such great parents, who are the very reason I am here now and I just hope I will be half as good them to my kids...:-)

A perfect way to wrap up my 8th month!!!!

Dear Sakshi,
    Aha! seeing the title,don't u get any ideas!!! A perfect way indeed to wrap up my 8th month...sigh! well I was being sarcastic....;-/ I am down with an irritating bout of sinus headache, something which was alien to me until quite recently.Whew!!! God Help!!!

Do I sound desperate?? Well...hmm..I didn't mean to sound like that, but hey my blog is all about my exact feelings per se, so here it is, all out in the open...:-) Those of u poor dears who have actually had to suffer from this dilemma would know what I mean, ahem...:-) But there is one thing for sure, I have suddenly realised the true worth of age old natural remedies. I have been through cold, cough and now sinus headaches, but not once did I have to depend on modern medicine. :-) Thanx to all those remdial natural medicines, which have given me immense relief, the recipes of which I will unfurl according to popular demand ;-) (to put in a pinch of drama or so to say) So folks rite now I have just stopped worrying about, my labour pain, baby naming issues, after labour sleep problems and what not...I am just gonna sit back and enjoy the rest of the ride and take each day as it comes, and when it does come to the labour pain....oh dear! I'll come to that later!!!!

What's in a name...? Apparently a lot!

Dear Sakshi,
    Hope all of u out there are doing fine...:-) My latest update seems to be a totally unwanted dilemma....names, names and more names!!!! Yup I am totally confused about the name we might pick for our lil' angel...Hmmm I knw I have set up a poll right here...but I am getting mixed votes and that confuses me even more. There's hardly a month left and me and vinuz still haven't zeroed in on a name yet...:-) Well like Karen my dear friend told me, I'm not gonna stress myself out...whew!!! I have enough to think about already...Hmm but even then I wonder...Oh well! back to things I am familiar with right now, like lack of sleep, my angel's solid kick boxing and a lot more...The other day my gyn was like surprised my lil' one should be stretching out soo much in my tummy, guess he's running out of space fast...lol! The moment my head hits the pillow he starts punching me like a bean bag!!! Well initially it was really enjoyable, but nowadays it has become more prominent and more insistent...I have a feeling he is going to be just like his dad and mom...lol! Both of us equally, did drive our parents nuts...:-) Ahem! well let's wait and watch for now...Hmm just one month more guyz, pray foe me!!! and hope I come up with the perfect name within the next couple of days....

Goin nuts, preggy mood swings and more.....

Dear Sakshi,

     The best part about being preggy is that ur pampered a looot!!! ;-) Really! That is the fun part, and ya u kinda feel really bad when u are not able to go out and do things u would have usually done otherwise. But one thing I really found nice was the number of people who actually took the effort to come and visit me. In our culture a woman carrying a child is given a lot of respect and love, and is totally pampered by her better half and her family and friends...Lol! But once the lil' one arrives then he is the star of the entire family!!!! The fact that after about 5 to 6 weeks I'll be finally able to see my angel is actually what keeps me going, despite all the variety of discomforts. U know the biggest problem is that half the time u are not sure about the varied pains and aches that attack u and sometimes it sends u into a chasm of panice and fear....but then u finally realise the fact that the said pain was just due to gastric issues...whew!!! u almost sigh with relief...Hmm I wonder if I'll be able to tolerate the pain...that's what I am thinking about these days really...Gosh!!! it is scary, but most of my recent mommy frndz vouch that yes! its gonna hurt a hell lot but it is manageable....Suddenly they all have become matured and experienced and I kinda feel like a kid myself...So many emotions flicker through my mind these days, and I am having a whole lot of dreamz as well...of water, me swimming, crossing roads frantically ( God knows for what!!!) lol! and a whole lot of crazy stuff...:-) Plus these days I do get a tad snappy with my folks...maybe its the wicked hormones!!! The best part is that no matter how grouchy, irritable or totally annoying u get, u can always blame it on the hormones and preggy mood swings...I knw its wicked...but it is during those times I feel as if I am a kid of 4 seriously!!! Maybe it is due to the preggy mood swings...at times I feel really happy and at other times I kinda feel glum...Hmmm anyways I have started counting the days, hours and minutes and hope all of ur prayers are with me. And yes!!! I promise!!! No More Preggy Mood Swings....:-)

To all the insomniacs in this world!!!

Dear Sakshi,

Yawn!!!! zzzz!!! and a couple of yawns later, I am still sleepy!!! whew! my heart goes out to all those who suffer from insomnia, seriously...or maybe insomniacs are probably more tolerant of their sleep issues...:-) But yes! my dear friends, I am positive and do remember to smile...:-) gosh! I am yawning as I write this, serves me right! for under estimating the value of good sleep. Like I said before, probably this is how u are trained for motherhood and for the endless sleepless nights ahead. Now I was just wondering....hmm....can it get any worse? And to that question all my experienced mommy friends,shake their heads and say," U would be a fool to think it wouldn't get any worse." Sigh!

But hey c'mon there is another side to all of this though. The moment u see ur angel smile at u, all ur tiredness, anger and frustration just melts away!!! :-) and this statement is also from the same new mommies!!! That is exactly what makes motherhood beautiful, and I don't think any mom out there would regret the time they have spend with their lil' ones. Years later when u look back at ur life, it is these moments that form the varied pages of ur life's autograph book.

Well back to the world of insomnia, the past week has been soooo tiring, yawn! sorry couldn't help that one! :-) A couple of weeks more and then comes the day I see my baby..Am I excited? YESSS!!! but equally scared as well!!! Well wouldn't u be? Hmmm emotions just seem to ebb freely now, maybe that's part of ur mental make up during ur preggy phase. Now, its not that I don't feel sleepy, its just that I can't seem to utilise that beauty sleep of mine. In that aspect I am different from the insomniacs.And I never for once thought that lack of sleep could intimidate ur life like this. Help!!! Oh well I knw I knw, its not easy, its never gonna be, and I am gonna face all of this with a smile on my face and joy in my heart, even if that smile is broken by a tired yawn!!! So this one is dedicated to all the insomniacs in the world...hope all of u get to sleep soon...:-)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Dear Sakshi,

Wow!!! finally its 2010!!! not that last year wasn't special, but this year its gonna be an eventful year for me...:-) I am in my 8th month now and my lil' one has been kicking away! :-) 2009' wasn't a bad year when u think about it, in fact it was a year which gave me happiness and sorrow alternately, but the joyful moments were more credible, so much so that i don't wanna remember those moments when I did feel sad...:-) So awaiting my angel's arrival with lots of anticipation and excitement...:-) Here's hoping all of u out there have an equally memorable 2010 ahead!!!

I know I haven't been writing regularly in my blog, but hey! I can hardly sit for more than half hour without squirming and an aching back. So I hardly get online, and even if I do, I do so only to check my mails...so that's that folks!

2009 ended on a beautiful note with me getting to meet some of my dear friends whom I hadn't met since I left school. Going back to ur old school is simply a beautiful experience altogether...:-) It felt so reassuring to be back where once we did have loads of fun and cheer. But the only low point was that most of our angelites' couldn't make it. We always called ourselves that, having studied at the Holy Angels' Convent! our school, our Alma mater...It was a beautiful walk down memory lane. Just sitting there chatting up like old times, comparing our life's stories made me realise the value of a great childhood. Its really important and its equally responsible for shaping us as the individuals that we are now. I had a great time and loved every minute of it. Hope next year we will be able to do it in a much larger scale and that next time everyone would be able to make it...:-) Three cheers for all the angelites'!!! :-)

As for my lil' one, he is growing and my stomach has grown too, making it all the more difficult to lie on my sides now. But now that I just have 2 more months to go, I am getting a bit more nervous I must say. But the joy of feeling ur baby move much more strongly now, is equally wonderful. I am cherishing every moment of my life now. :-) Hoping for the very best in 2010 and praying for life's very best for my beloved and my lil' angel. :-)